Break time!

Hello,

I hate having to write this but I feel right now I need to take a break from this blog, for a couple of reasons. I have no idea how long this will be... but I will tell you I'll still be around on Facebook and I'll continue to share giveaways there as I see them.

Here's what's going on:

1. As you know, I've had many many computer issues this past year. I'm having issues again and I just don't feel like dealing with it right now. I can work from my boyfriend's computer, but all of my files are on my computer.

2. This is the big one: I really never feel well but the past month or so I've been going through what I think of as my "low energy periods": my headaches are typically worse - I'm often in enough pain that suicide comes to mind almost daily - not that I would ever do it, I'm just in enough pain that I want it to end and at times death seems the only option. It isn't an option though. Anyway, the pain aside, I'm so fatigued I barely have enough energy to do the dishes. On a good normal day, I'm fatigued enough that I have to wash the dishes a little bit at a time. There's only the two of us, so there really aren't that many dishes. That's when I'm feeling well. The past few weeks doing simple little things like this have been even harder, but I've been pushing myself to do them. To top it off, I've been working on the blog and adding to my stress load.

A couple of days ago a couple of friends mentioned they have Chronic Epstein Barr virus. This is the virus which causes Mono. From what I've read, an estimated 95% of adults carry the virus but not every one gets symptoms. Apparently you often get the virus as a child, but it's very possible to not even know you're sick or to mistake it for something else. Once you have the virus, it stays with you forever. In some individuals, the virus becomes chronic and they experience symptoms off and on throughout their lives.

Here are the symptoms: "aggression, allergies, anxiety, cold sweats, confusion, decreased alertness, decreased libido, reduced motor skills, minimized stress tolerance, depression, trouble concentrating, trouble completing mathematics or other reasoning tasks, trouble urinating, discomfort after sexual activity, dry cough, earaches, excessive worrying, severe fatigue, fever, headaches, hostility, hypersomnia, increased nasal congestion and dripping, irritability, insomnia, ringing of the ears, shingles, paranoia, sore throat, sore muscles, joint soreness, tremors, light sensitivity, mood swings, mild delusions and/or migraines."

Read more: http://www.livestrong.com/article/40986-chronic-epsteinbarr-virus-symptoms/#ixzz26E7erZIU

I have almost all of the symptoms that it's become chronic. I have no way to get to a specialist to get tested to confirm I have it, but considering my symptoms and the high estimation of individuals who carry the virus, I have to assume I do have it.

In short, this means I need to rest more. I strongly feel I need to take a break from the blog so I can give myself some time to unstress and rest. I really hate doing this because I'm already so limited in how much I can do... and it really makes me feel like I'm being lazy when I'm not being productive. However, I realize now just how important taking things slower and resting is if I really do have this virus. It can cause a LOT of other health problems when not taken care of.

I hope you'll understand when I say right now I feel my time would be better spent resting, and healing but also learning what more I can do to fight this.

With all of that being said, I have been feeling better this week. My headaches have been improving which is typically my first sign that I'm getting better with any sickness. I still have some of the bothersome symptoms though, so I'm definitely not completely over this. From what I've read it can last a few months. I'm not saying I'll be gone for months - I don't know how long it will be. I just need some space and air to breathe.

Thank you all for supporting me in the past and I hope you will continue to do so during my break. Here's hoping it's a speedy one :)